There’s something genuinely interesting about Pride and Prejudice and Zombies when it first gets going. As a relative newbie to both Seth Grahame-Smith’s book the film is based on and the Jane Austen book that book is based on (forgive my ignorance, I beg you), the juxtaposition of the white upper crust at the turn of the 19th century with the socio-political, blood-letting genre pleasures of zombie and martial arts movies is a lot of fun. Not blow-your-mind, innovative fun, but straightforward, shoveling-popcorn-in-your-face, night-out-at-the-movies fun. The novelty wears off, though, and what’s left is a decently entertaining but frustratingly anti-climactic pop culture mash-up that doesn’t quite live up to its potential.

Writer-director Burr Steers does indeed have a few good things in place at the film’s outset, most notably a game young cast who generally hold up their end of the bargain. Elizabeth (Lily James), Jane (Bella Heathcote) and the rest of the Bennet sisters grab our attention immediately, gossiping and fantasizing about their respective dream suitors as they tighten each others’ corsets and polish their pointy zombie-slaying weapons. (The movie’s gender-reversal twist is that, in this world, the women generally do the fighting while the men often cower away in a corner. It’s a strong sentiment that loses its power due to Steers trumpeting it too loudly.) The strongest male warrior in the land, the brooding, handsome Mr. Darcy (a pleasantly ashy-voiced Sam Riley), who Elizabeth at first detests. The sexual tension between them is as thick as butter, of course (they’re both stubborn loners), and James and Riley do a fine job building that chemistry. Jane’s matched up with Mr. Bingley (Douglass Booth), but their relationship’s only significant to the plot and nothing more.

Elizabeth and Darcy is where all the real action and drama stems from; their union is inevitable but is stopped dead (cough) by an impending wave of zombie hordes that threatens to wipe out all of London. While the hard-headed Darcy prefers to meet the undead head-on on the battlefield, Elizabeth meets a shady stranger who proposes a treaty with the zombies, facilitated by a process that placates their hunger for human flesh (feed them animal parts and they stop being belligerent assholes for a while). The plot really starts to get in the way of the actors in that they aren’t really given a lot of space to explore the more interesting corners of their respective characters’ personalities before a stupid string of exposition ruins the mood. That being said, James and Riley are a wonderful match and go above and beyond to keep us invested.

What’s worse, with all the anticipation built up of an unstoppable zombie army and the promise of a great war with the undead for the fate of London, we get absolutely nothing of the sort. There are a few displays of zombie slaughtering throughout the movie, but an epic, sprawling, LOTR: The Two Towers melee never comes. A disappointment to say the least.

The movie’s half-comedy, of course, its silly premise a clear giveaway that we shouldn’t take the material so goddamn seriously. Problem is, the movie just isn’t that funny. Again, much of the humor relies on the subversion of gender roles too heavily (is seeing a woman kick ass in a movie really so uncommon that we need to point it out so incessantly?) and the novelty of aristocrats being highly skilled warriors loses its luster before the plot even gets going. The movie’s major highlight is Matt Smith, playing the prissy Parson Collins who, despite his best efforts, can’t convince any of the Bennet sisters to take his hand in marriage. He first has his sights set on the already-spoken-for Jane but then concedes that he’ll settle for any of the sisters, a sentiment that isn’t met favorably by the girls or their parents (Charles Dance and Sally Phillips). Parson’s inability to see himself for the idiot the rest of us see him as is one joke that never gets old, thanks to the refined talents of Mr. Smith.

Steers tries to represent the wit of Austen’s material as best he can, but all the nonsense of the (frankly awful) zombie-slaying half of the story gets in the way at every turn. There’s a balance to be struck between respecting the integrity of Pride and Prejudice while having fun with the wacky experiment of throwing zombies into the mix, and Steers’ attempt is decidedly wobbly. The romance done well, but the decapitation, stabbing and zombie mass-destruction? That bit could have used an extra dash of crazy sauce to even out this unappetizing plate of lit-horror fusion.

If last week’s release of the new Jurassic Park trailer wasn’t enough to trigger some pleasant nostalgia, then the trailer for Alan Taylor’s Terminator: Genisys, the first of a new trilogy of Terminator films, should really cap off your Throwback Thursday. As if this jaunt down memory lane wasn’t exciting enough, Arnold Schwarzenegger is BACK, making good on that over-quoted promise, to reincarnate the much beloved cyborg hero.

This time, Skynet has it out for John Connor using both the past AND the future to stage the ultimate attack. So it’s a good thing Matt Smith is rumored to be among the cast as he does seem to have a penchant for time traveling gigs. No doubt John Connor, played by Jason Clarke, will be needing a Doctor over the course of this three film journey. Game of Thrones’ Emilia Clarke will be breathing new life into the indomitable character of Sarah Connor. Really, as if we needed another draw. With the usual exorbitant amount of explosions, gunfire, and car chases complete with air-flipping school buses, the release date for this robot reboot is set for July 1st, 2015.

Ryan Gosling knew this was going to happen. His directorial debut screened in the Un Certain Regarde category of Cannes and, naturally, packed the house as if it was the most highly buzzed Palme D’Or contender of the year. Two hours later the film ended, and people took to Twitter in disbelief, shock, and sarcasm engaged to the max. Yet, the film already began building a loyal fan base who defend its great aesthetics, originality, and the fact that it’s never boring. But getting your teeth pulled out by rusty pliers is probably never boring either. After making whatever Lost River is, there’s no way Gosling didn’t expect exactly that kind of reaction. Is there a point in even laying out the plot here? A mother (Christina Hendricks) works in a seedy bar and has to take care of two boys, one of whom is nicknamed Bones (Iain De Caestecker) and is sort of our protagonist. After getting news that they’re about to get displaced, she takes another job in an ever seedier bar, operated by her banker Dave (Ben Mendelsohn) so that she can pay three months in advance. Meanwhile, Bones attempts to outwit a local gang leader called Bully (Matt Smith) to help with the rent, and gets moral support from a friend called Rat (Saorise Ronan). Yes. Bones, Bully, and Rat.

The actors do a decent enough job and go beyond the call of duty that their names suggest, but it’s Mendelsohn who outshines everyone and truly looks like he belongs in the fucked up world Gosling juke-boxed together. The film spins out of control quite quickly and goes into experimental mode; becoming a lab for Gosling to play around with a Greatest Hits collection of influences (David Lynch, Nicolas Winding Refn, and Gaspar Noe most notably, though the re-occurring image of burning buildings recalls one of my favorite cinematic shots, possibly ever, from Akira Kurosawa’s Ran) without needing to make much sense. The idea is to evoke a nightmarish atmosphere and make the whole thing into some form of parable for the housing crisis in middle America, or you know, he’s just fucking around. Whatever it is, he’s got me cursing for the first time in a Cannes review and that’s because most of the scenes, as great as they look (an image of a burning bicycle, the macabre bar where Hendricks begins to work, and the images of her in the plastic suit are undeniably striking and get etched into your mind, for better or for worse) don’t amount to anything substantial. This isn’t just style over substance, this is style raping substance.

The music deserves a mention, however, because (and this is a direct Refn influence) the electronic notes work in sinister fashion to help the overall grotesqueness occurring on-screen. If there was a Cannes award for Best Soundtrack, Lost River would be a shoe-in. As it stands, it’s nothing more than a first-time director’s messy homage to some of his favorites. The reason it’s getting so much attention, and will most likely go down as a cult favorite in certain circles, is because the director happens to be Ryan Gosling. Thanks to his name, though, he manages to assemble artists like Mendelsohn, Ronan, cinematographer Benoit Debie, and composer Johnny Jewel who elevate this psychedelic bad trip from complete disaster into a twisted kind of entertainment.

Before the film officially premieres later this week at Cannes, a new clip from Ryan Gosling‘s Lost River has hit the Internet. The clip doesn’t give us much except Matt Smith chanting at Iain De Caestecker to look at his muscles. From what we know of the film, De Caestecker plays Bones, son to Christina Hendricks‘ character Billy, who finds an underwater town. Matt Smith goes simply by Bully, and with his sequined jacket, microphone, and flaming bicycle antics he already appears to be one of what will undoubtedly be some interesting characters. We’re nowhere nearer understanding what this film is all about, but it was on our Most Anticipated Films of Cannes List and this just has us all the more excited to see it!

First Clip of Lost River

Hungarian director Benedek Fliegauf’s Womb is a quiet, abstract, and eerie science fiction film about a woman who has a hard time of letting go. There is no doubt that it has drawn some controversy due to incest playing a big role in the film. With a taboo subject, slow moving and depressing feel, it is easy to see how Womb would be difficult for the average viewer to sit through, however, I found no such difficulties.

Womb begins with a voice over, “Just because you went away, it does not mean you are not here anymore. Perhaps I all ever needed was this gift. The one you gave to me at the end.” The last line is important as this opening scene is really the end. It is hard to call it foreshowing because if you pay attention it practically gives the ending away.

A friendship begins when two young children meet on a rainy beach underneath a dock. Soon Rebecca and Thomas share much of their time with one another which normally consists of going on beach adventures together. But that does not last for long as Rebecca informs Thomas that she will be moving away with her mother to Tokyo to live in an apartment on the 72nd floor.

The film then jumps ahead 12 years later when Rebecca (Eva Green) is now an adult. We see her take the same ferry back into the town she left on as a child. Rebecca now lives in the same house she grew up in. Eager to see Thomas she finds out that he does not live too far away from where he grew up at. When the two do finally meet again as adults Thomas (Matt Smith) remembers the exact floor number of the apartment she moved away to so long ago.

Not long after the two reunite Thomas tragically dies in a car accident. This is where Womb takes an interesting turn. While mourning his loss she comes up with the bizarre idea of giving birth to his clone so that she can effectively bring him back into the world again. Perhaps cloning him is Rebecca’s way of coping with the idea of Thomas’s death being her fault. At least that would be the most logical answer but that is when the film takes another turn, a controversial one at that.

Never moving faster than it needed to, sometimes even a bit too slow, the film showed us subtle hints of something deeply troubling Rebecca. There is intense passion she has for her son/lover that goes back and forth between being a mother and being attracted to her deceased lover.

The director of photography, Peter Szatmari, repeatedly shows long empty shots of an overcast beach, resulting in beautiful cinematography that was carefully done. It accurately portrays the loneliness and isolation that is found in Rebecca.

In a lot of ways Eva Green’s character in this film is similar to the one she played in the Jordan Scott’s marvelous film Cracks. Both of the characters had to deal with unconventional sexual desires. Green’s performance here is solid, on the outside there is not a lot going on but it is evident that on the inside she is torn.

Because Womb moves at a snail’s pace, some audiences may find it difficult to hold their interest in it. Others may find it hard to get over the underlying theme of incest. If you can get past those two big hurdles then you will see the film does have something to offer aside from the amazing cinematography. The film shows how powerful nostalgia can be and how difficult it can be to let go.