You couldn’t ask for two actors better suited to play a couple of sharp-featured, hipster vampire lovers than Tilda Swinton and Tom Hiddleston, two actors who’ve hit the absolute peak of coolness at this point in their respective careers. And who better to direct them than Jim Jarmusch, the indie godfather who always seems to be ahead of the curve stylistically, speeding down the roadway we call cinema in his own lane? Sadly, Jarmusch falls behind the curve in Only Lovers Left Alive, a tiresome love story that’s too fascinated with cleverly subverting (it thinks) vampire lore to say anything truly interesting. Is Jarmusch’s exercise in aimless chatting a unique take on bloodsucker cinema? Yes. But he so aggressively concerns himself with subverting the myth that film becomes burdened by it.

Hiddleston plays Adam, an underground indie musician who lives in the forgotten American wasteland of Detroit, swimming in vinyl records, antiquated electronics, and vintage guitars dropped off at his grungy house by his innocent “zombie” (human) stoner buddy named Ian (a perfectly casted Anton Yelchin). His lover of centuries, Eve (Swinton), lives in Tangier, stuffing her nose in piles of dusty old books in every language and meeting with her old friend Marlowe (John Hurt) at a late-night cafe. (Yes, you can actually see hipster-stench wafting off of the screen.) Marlowe is irritated that he never got credit for writing Shakespeare’s plays, one of many obnoxiously presented wink-wink jokes about immortality aimed at fans of vampire fiction who have probably heard this stuff a million times.

Eve flies to Detroit to reunite with her precious Adam, and a steamy reunion it is–their passion for each other hasn’t dwindled a bit over the hundreds of years they’ve been canoodling all over the world. Hiddleston and Swinton sizzle, and their fiery scenes in close proximity are the film’s most engaging. The film slyly suggests that the world’s greatest artists were all members of a sort of vampire aristocracy, with Adam’s wall adorned with a gallery of portraits of supposed vamps (Buster Keaton, Joe Strummer, Mark Twain, Claire Denis, and others). Jack White even gets a shout out, as Adam and Eve drive by his childhood home on a nighttime drive through the city. The marriage of vampire lore with artistic icons is unique and intriguing at first, but it’s prodded and poked to death by incessant referencing.

It seems as if Jarmusch thought long and hard about how to represent vampire life in ways never seen before. He finds new angles. Adam and Eve get their blood in purified packets from doctors (the great Jeffrey Wright) and friends–human blood is so packed with impurities these days that sucking straight from the throat is a health risk. Their taste in the arts is so hyper-sophisticated because they’ve soaked up several lifetimes worth of music, books, and stage performance. Makes sense. Eve makes tasty Type-O blood popsicles, a culinary invention that seems pulled from the vampire section of Pinterest. These plays on the genre are clever, but add very, very little to the story at hand. Light chuckles at best.

But there isn’t much story to sink your teeth into, anyway. That’s not what Jarmusch is aiming for; leave that stuff to Stephanie Meyer. He’s defining the attitude of a culturally refined, endangered generation so repulsed by the vapid state of young people that they’re driven to the brink of suicide. (Adam has the eager Ian fetch him a wooden bullet, which he intends to off himself with. That is, until Eve shows up to perk him up and rekindle his will.) The film is perhaps more interesting as a piece hipster fiction, using vampirism as a metaphor to explain their endless love for old, tattered things.

As a hangout movie, Only Lovers is sometimes great, with Hiddleston and Swinton’s seductive repartee slipping off their tongues like melted butter. But again, vamp references distract and derail scenes often. The production design by Marco Bittner Rosner is luscious and brilliantly captured by Jarmusch (he’s a master at that). There are loads of edgy, stylish images throughout the film, like the opening shot of a starry night sky spinning and spinning until it takes the shape of a spinning vinyl record in Adam’s abode. Only Lovers Left Alive is one of Jarmusch’s most alluring films stylistically, but the self-conscious, often silly script makes it hard to fully indulge in its sensual wonders.

Only Lovers Left Alive trailer

Going back to TIFF my day was filled with catching up yet again. While everyone was abuzz for Gravity (review coming soon!) and The Double, I was out viewing some leftovers from Cannes earlier this year yet again.

Only Lovers Left Alive

I have to respectfully disagree with my great overlord and editor Dustin on some of his Cannes reviews. Earlier this year, he caught Only Lovers Left Alive and disliked it. While it’s easy to understand why Only Lovers isn’t beloved (it is Jarmusch after all), I was in love with what he was doing here for the most part. Vampires Adam and Eve (Tom Hiddleston and Tilda Swinton) have been together for centuries, but are currently on opposite sides of the world. Adam, a former rockstar, mopes around in his dilapidated Detroit mansion hiding from the public, and Eve spends her time in Tangier with Christopher Marlowe (John Hurt, and yes he is playing that Christopher Marlowe).

Adam’s disdain of humans, or “zombies” as he calls them, begins driving him to the point of suicide, which makes Eve travel by night to meet up with him again. The first hour focuses almost entirely on Adam and Eve lounging around as they listen to old music and discuss the brilliant artists throughout their lives. Jarmusch’s portrayal of immortality as one obsessed with nostalgia and consuming art feels realistic, and I couldn’t help but live vicariously through Adam and Eve. With time removed as a factor in people’s lives, who wouldn’t spend all of their nights absorbing as much as they can about different cultures? Watching Jarmusch, Swinton and Hiddleston go around geeking out over so many things, from antique instruments to awesome soul singles, is a joy to watch.

It’s also nice to see that, after the sombre but gorgeous The Limits of Control, Jarmusch is more playful again. Swinton and Hiddleston deadpan plenty of killer lines, and the addition of Mia Wasikowska as Eve’s problematic sister Ava brings a lot of laughs. The final part of the film, which shifts the narrative back to Tangier, doesn’t work entirely since it puts too much weight on a film that works because of its flighty nature. It’s only a small issue in a truly enjoyable film, and one of Jarmusch’s most entertaining in a while. I recommend sitting back, letting the amazing soundtrack work its magic and wonder about how great it could be to live like the two main characters.

RATING: 7.8

Like Father Like Son

Next up is yet another big disagreement between Dustin and myself. Steven Spielberg and the Cannes jury gave Like Father, Like Son the Jury Prize this year, and despite the endless raves for it (including one from our own site) I personally did not care for it.

Ryota (Fukuyama Masaharu) is a rich architect who, as the saying goes, seemingly has it all. He has a supportive wife, Midori (Ono Machiko), and they have a 6 year old son named Keita. Ryota is hard-working and strict on Keita, who is struggling to get admitted into a prestigious primary school. Everything changes when they get a phone call from the hospital telling them something terrible; their son was switched with another couple’s baby. The DNA tests confirm the mistake, throwing Ryota and Midori into a major crisis. Do they keep Keita, raising him as they already have been for the past 6 years, or switch him with their real son?

Conceptually it’s a fascinating and tough moral debate on nature versus nurture, but Kore-Eda doesn’t explore this issue much. It’s very obvious from the beginning that he sides with love over blood, and for the next 2 hours he simply hammers this point home repeatedly. Some interesting dynamics are introduced into the story, like the class difference between the two families (Keita’s ‘true’ parents are working class but more affectionate towards their children), but the bulk of the film is simply waiting for its characters to reach the same conclusion Kore-Eda has made.

With the film’s central question and debate answered for, there really is no work for the audience left to do. That resulted in me being bored out of my mind for much of Like Father, Like Son. Ryota’s arc would be a fascinating one to watch if it wasn’t so predictable, and the way he’s painted as a villain at times is frustrating. Especially after watching The Past, where the subtleties of the film’s dramatic content are explored in such a thought-provoking way, Like Father, Like Son‘s simplistic handling of such a morally complex situation just looks lazy.

RATING: 5.8

The Strange Colour of Your Body’s Tears

As I said in my last TIFF update, I was trying to get into The Double. As you can tell by the title, I sadly did not get into the film. I decided to run across town and catch The Strange Colour of Your Body’s Tears, the newest film from Hélène Cattet and Bruno Forzani. Cattet/Forzani directed Amer, which I was a big fan of. Theoretically Strange Colour should work just the same, as it uses the overload of style and Giallo influences that made their last film such a treat to watch. That theory proves to be correct for the first 30 or so minutes, as the simple story of a man looking for his missing wife in their labyrinthine apartment building has every stylistic trick in the book thrown at it, but eventually the charm wears off.

It wouldn’t be so bad if it wasn’t for the fact that the film’s ear-piercingly loud soundtrack and attempt at a narrative are so grating that by the hour mark I was ready for the credits. Instead I had another 40 or so minutes to go, and by the finale I found a lot of Strange Colour to be insufferable. The style is still magnificent when it works, and some of the random segments (including a cop’s explanation of how he got a scar on his neck and a woman being haunted by a murderer in her walls) are plenty of fun on their own. It’s just too bad that, as a whole, The Strange Colour of Your Body’s Tears is torturous.

RATING: 4.5

Next up:

It’s horror day at TIFF! I start off with Eli Roth and Ti West’s new films, then cap it all off with a midnight screening of Oculus.

Nebraska

There is not a whole lot that goes on in Nebraska, similar to the small towns that are featured in it, but this is a road trip/family bonding film that is extremely entertaining. Nebraska is not perfect, but it may end up being the year’s best road trip film. Payne keeps the camera rolling a bit too long in the final scenes, resulting in an ending that should have been shortened by about five minutes or so. Nonetheless, Nebraska is finally a Payne film that I can confidently stand behind.

RATING: 7.8

Read my full review of Nebraska

Only Lovers Left Alive

Perhaps the reasoning for not having a morning press screening of Jim Jarmusch’s new film here at the Cannes Film Festial is an obvious one, Only Lovers Left Alive is a midnight film and should not be seen during the day. Considering this film is about vampires, darkness is the overall theme of the film. In fact, there is not even a single shot of the film that shows daylight. Only Lovers Left Alive has fun with itself and the genre by modernizing to present day; where vampires too can have iPhones and YouTube.

The biggest problem for me about the film is how redundant it gets after the first hour. The very beginning starts off with a record spinning shot that is layered over top of a shot the main characters (Tom Hiddleston and Tilda Swinton). This exact same layered record spinning effect is done about two or three more times after the opening. It also reiterates the punch line of the vampires being centuries old so many times that is becomes too repetitive to be funny. I also found the characters spending a great deal of time drooling over vintage guitars and other musical instruments. Yes, I may be nitpicking a little bit and yes, there are some good parts about the film too. But for me, the bad significantly outweighed the good in Only Lovers Left Alive.

RATING: 5.7